After selling Pearl, I started riding with people who really knew what they were doing, which I wasn't doing when I had Pearl since I was mostly riding solo. I had ridden with really good riders before Pearl, but at a very different pace than I did after Pearl. I learned a lot with my mare, and so had more confidence in my riding skills after owning her than I had had before.
The summer after I sold her, I did my first 50 mile ride on a horse I had ridden only once before, about a week before the ride, and with someone (Robert) I had only met a couple times before (once doing a 3 day clinic with him and my dad, and the second time when I met the horse, a week before the ride). I wouldn't necessarily call myself shy, but I am definitely reserved, and so this ride was an entirely new thing for me - new person, new horse, new distance, new place. Looking back, I don't think I would have had the confidence to do this before owning Pearl, and even after owning her I was nervous. Ironically, I wasn't at all unsure about riding the horse, and wasn't too nervous about the distance either, it was more the fact of being basically alone with my fellow rider for the ten hours it took us to complete the ride that stressed me out. Whenever I thought about the upcoming ride, I wasn't sure what I should say, or whether he would be nice or not, or whether I would make a good impression. I didn't want to do something stupid and embarrass myself. He is an extremely well known endurance rider, and his breadth of knowledge and experience intimidated me a little, since I had no experience at all (it was my first 50). But, he was nice and funny and not the kind to rub his knowledge in your face at all. Instead, he taught me a a lot, and both he and, I later discovered, his wife Melissa, are the kind who gently teach people by pointing out ways to make things easier for either the horse or rider (for example, on my most recent ride with them, we dismounted to run a section of the trail. I was riding a tall horse, and so once on the ground I couldn't reach the stirrups to cross them over the top of the saddle, which I generally do if I get off to run so that the stirrups don't bump against the horse's sides with every step. Robert didn't say anything at the time, but the next time we dismounted, he looked at me and said, "those english saddles are nice because, if you have a tall horse, you can pull the stirrup up with your foot as you dismount and get it over the top of the saddle easily" or something like that. He didn't immediately correct me the first time I didn't pull the stirrups over, or tell me I had done something wrong or in any way make me feel like I didn't know what I was doing, but instead, at the next opportunity, simply showed me an easier way of doing the right thing). That first ride was amazing, I learned A LOT, and I couldn't wait to do it again.
That winter, I flew out to do two more 50s in Florida with the Robert and Melissa, who generously let me stay in their house for the week, and I worked with them and did two more 50s (and experienced my first pull) over this last summer. Each time I came away more confident in my skills and abilities. I now have 250 AERC miles, and, while I still have so much to learn, I have learned more at every ride, whether it be an event, a conditioning ride, or a twenty minute run around some Scottish fields.
Since Pearl, there have been many horses in my life and I learn something new from every one.
After doing those endurance rides, I posted on the Scottish Endurance Riders page on Facebook, offering to exercise horses for people who needed an extra rider. That led to where I am now - I am doing my first event in Scotland (a 20km SERC ride) in a few weeks and have been riding Icelandic horses with some really great people for over a year now.
I also have a new confidence - I feel like I can jump on a horse I've never ridden before and ride 50 miles (in fact, I have done this before. Obviously, I wouldn't do this on just any horse - it would have to be a horse offered by someone I know, respect, and trust). I don't think I would have been able to confidently do this before I owned Pearl, and so I consider the brief three years of time when Pearl and I were a team as a training time for now. If I hadn't sold Pearl, I probably wouldn't have started riding with the Ribleys or riding the Icelandics, and I definitely wouldn't have had the chance to ride so many different horses and learn so many new things. So, while selling Pearl was hard, it ultimately led me to where I am today.